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• (586): View more from Michigan

  I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  What you up to?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Full throttle

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.

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• (530): View more from California

  Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  Is it possibile to sprain your taint?

  (1-208): View more from Idaho

  She was that bad?

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Happy you have kids and I don't day!

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• (713): View more from Texas

  must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh

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• (760): View more from California

  We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face

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