I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Blood and glitter go together right?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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