oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
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literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
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The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT