Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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