My liver just broke up with me...
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Randomize