I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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