Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
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Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
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It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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