Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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