I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
