apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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