i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
