i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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