i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
