You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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