it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
The air was thick with penises
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
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