I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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