I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
