i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize