By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize