The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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