you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize