Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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