he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
We smell like vodka and hangover
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