With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
