is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
