he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
