Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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