I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
