He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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