So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
