You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
