This is not my ceiling
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
