Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
