I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
So squirting runs in the family.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
