Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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