So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Your dad touched me again.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Randomize
