i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize