And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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