I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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