Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
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I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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