Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
i think i have two assholes
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
