I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
