Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
