didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Dear god my vagina.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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