At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
