If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
