Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
