My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize