it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
