then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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