But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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